350 – Whats in Your Toolbox for Getting People to Do Things?

#faithbites #faithjourney toolbox

In between church services this morning, my eldest was a greeter for people coming into church. I could tell she didn’t want to do it as she was tired from being up early to sing. She was moping around, playing with her Girl Scout vest, knocking over programs and more. I slightly raised my voice and that didn’t do anything. Then I tried to explain the situation to her and that didn’t do it. Lastly, I even tried to show love and kindness, and that didn’t do much. Finally, it was time to go sing and she was done greeting for the morning.

That experience made me think about the tools in our toolbox for getting people to do things. We can try anger, violence, love, understanding, ignoring the unwanted behavior or any combination of these. What I learned today, is if the person doesn’t want to do it, they aren’t going to do it. I had a physician friend tell me that he could be the best doctor, prescribe the best medications, best treatment, but if the person doesn’t trust him and doesn’t want the help, they won’t do it.

As a parent this is hard. Sometimes I just want my kids to just get it and do it. No arguing, no explaining, just do what I asked pleased. I wonder if God feels like that sometimes?

In his toolbox he used anger and violence (plagues, floods, and more in the Old Testament), he used explanation (Old and New), he used love and understanding (mostly New Testament but some old). Despite using all the tools in his toolbox, some of us just don’t get it.

Scripture

• Wrath
  • For behold, the Lord is coming out from his place
    to punish the inhabitants of the earth for their iniquity, and the earth will disclose the blood shed on it, and will no more cover its slain. – Isaiah 26:11
  • I will execute great vengeance on them with wrathful rebukes. Then they will know that I am the Lord, when I lay my vengeance upon them.” – Ezekiel 25:17
• Love
  • The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. – Jeremiah 31:3
  • For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. – John 3:16
• Patience
  • The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. – 2 Peter 3:9
  • May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, – Romans 15:5

Reflection

The scriptures above represent three tools with two verses each. There are many variations of these themes throughout the Bible. Previously, we also talked about God’s silence for 400 years in which I would like to compare it to when we ignore children’s unwanted behavior.

As parents, friends, family, and people we use these different tools to try to enact a change in behavior from others. While I would like to say I always use kindness, love, compassion, and patience, I know that isn’t true. The funny thing is that even though I know anger doesn’t work long term, it can show short term results. The question we need to ask is at what cost?

You may win the battle but lose the war as that relationship is tarnished. Just like God changing from mostly a god of vengeance to peace and love through Christ Jesus, we change to see what works and what doesn’t.

I apologize often when use the wrong tool in my toolbox. I hope through Grace, that my tool choice will be better and have long lasting results.

Charge

How do you enact change in people? What tools do you decide to you. Maybe you find that some work for some and others for other people. Knowing the best tool for the job will provide you with the best outcomes. Look at your behaviors and how it impacts or doesn’t impact others. Turn to God and see if he can help you chose the best tool.

Lord, help me to know what tool to use when interacting with those in my life. Let me share your word and strength through all of my actions. Help me hide the tools I don’t need, and have easy access to those that will help me follow your plan.