Speak Up for your needs
June 21 – Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

4:172 – Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

#faithbites #faithjourney speak


A common refrain at weddings is, “Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace”. This is usually said right before the preacher confirms the marriage. They ask if anyone has any reasons why the two shall not be wed., We’ve all seen movies where someone comes at the last minute to break up the wedding, but in real life what happens?

I have found myself only speaking up when others are concerned but not when my own needs aren’t being met or I need help. I preach to my children to always ask for help, but then I martyr myself for others. Does this happen to you? Do you find yourself not speaking up because either you want to be accepted or don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings? Does this make you resent others? Remember, when we resent someone or don’t forgive them, it’s like drinking poison and hoping for the other person to die. It doesn’t work. God wants us to share how we feel.

Today’s Questions: Do you share how you are feeling? Are you advocating for yourself for your needs to be met? How does God help ensure that your needs are met?

  • Galatians 5:1 – For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.
  • Matthew 18:15 -“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. 


God doesn’t tell us to take punishment. He actively tells us to rebuke and teach with kindness. He also made us be strong and courageous. When we are not standing firm, we are, not living the way God wants us to. Now, standing firm doesn’t mean being pushy or a jerk, it means standing for the truth and helping others. I fail in this. When I’ve gone too long without speaking up, when I do stand tall, I can be a jerk. It doesn’t come out right because I’m suppressed those feelings to long. The second major point, as we see in Matthew, is how we correct and stand up. We don’t do it in public. We do it privately with love and kindness. If that doesn’t work, then we bring in one or two others. If that doesn’t work, then you bring in the church. What I’ve seen is most people, forget step one (private) and step two (a small group) and go straight for the public. This doesn’t work either. So what can we do?

We talk to about our needs with love. One day, one incident at a time. Don’t let it build up. In Ephesians 4:26, God tells us to not let the sun go down while we are still angry. If we take it one thing at a time, if we share how we are feeling, then we can move forward. I have messed this up more than I could count or confess. I try to make amends and change my approach. With Jesus, I can do it. It will just take time, patience, and effort.

As we close, remember God wants you to speak up. Don’t be a pushover or take it lying down. Measure your approach, speak to each incident and do it in private first. If you follow God’s way, you will see success.


Lord Jesus, help us to stand tall in our faith and for our needs. You say you will meet all of our needs, but we have our part to play as well. Let us be strong, patient, kind, and loving when we speak up for ourselves. Protect us, and let our words fall on kind and receptive ears. We ask this in your name, Amen.

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