4:96 – Setting Boundaries

#faithbites #faithjourney boundaries

Setting

I know this may be a shock to you, but I am far from perfect. One of my biggest faults, and my mother in law said this years ago, is I’m too nice and can let people walk all over me. Last night I snapped at my family for always asking me to do everything. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a people pleasure and want to help everyone. Sometimes, it’s a little much. I don’t blame anyone but myself as I give in because I want to help and make things easier for them.

Just this morning a good friend said I need to set and keep boundaries. Setting and keeping boundaries are hard. Not only for me, but when I don’t keep them it greys the line and makes it harder for others.

Today’s Questions: What does Jesus tell us about keeping boundaries? How does not keeping boundaries not only hurt ourselves but those who we are trying to help?

Scripture

• Galatians 6:5 – For each will have to bear his own load.
• Proverbs 25:17 – Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor’s house, lest he have his fill of you and hate you
• Galatians 6:2 – Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Reflection

At first glance, you may think the scriptures above say we shouldn’t help each other. In fact, the opposite is true. We should help but sometimes helping is hurting.

In Galatians 6:5, we see that each should bear their own load. That doesn’t mean we can’t help. But when we bear all of their load, they aren’t getting stronger and fufilling their challenges. You may be thinking the bible is contradictory because I’m verse 6:2, it says to bear one anothers burdens. Here is the operative phrase, one another, meaning we help each other out. Often when we don’t set boundaries, it is one sided. We do for others and they don’t do for us. It’s not being selfish but can lead to resentment .

This resentment can lead to hate as well as the other person not being able to carry their load as through your help, they never developed the skills they needed. We see this in our Proverbs verse. We need good neighbors but shouldn’t overstep.

If you’ve read this far, you may be overwhelmed. I know I am. It’s so hard to strike that balance. For me, I’m out of balance because I’m snapping and feeling unappreciated even though every says they do. It’s on me, though God’s help, to see better boundaries and do it in a kind and loving way.

As we close, think about what boundaries you can set to help yourself and those who want to hell. Remember, keep God at the center and you won’t go astray.

Prayer

Lord Jesus, thank you for helping us in all things. We pray that you help us strike a balance between help and harm. Let us be your force for helping others in ways that is good for them while not causing harm to ourselves. We struggle in this and ask for your guidance and love. In your name, Amen.