June 30 – The Ups and Downs of Marriage
The Ups and Downs of Marriage

#181of365 #FaithBites #FaithJourney Marriage #FriendsRequest

Before we get started, this is the first of many #faithbites based on requests of friends. Thank you for answering the call with your favorite verses, things you want to learn about, and ideas of how the Lord impacts your life. Never one to look a challenge down, I took the hardest one first. And now, onto #Faithbites.

I love my wife. We have been through the good, the bad, the ugly, and the I don’t know what to call it.  She has been by my side, no matter what I throw at her. And I don’t think I have slept on the couch but there have been days for sure. I am blessed that every day I have someone who knows me and puts up with me. I also believe that God gave us marriage so that we are not alone. We have someone who knows our in’s, our outs, our ups, our downs, and can help us make sense of life.

When we first got married, I told my wife that she reminded me of the Icarus story in mythology. If you remember, Icarus had a rope tied around him that was pulled back before he got too close to the sun. Getting too close meant his wings would melt and he would die. I felt that way, that she was my rope, pulling me back from certain doom. It takes a lot to admit that.

Scripture on Marriage

Featured Scripture: “Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.” – Proverbs 21:19

Related Scripture:

  • “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” – Genesis 2:24
  • “With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” – Ephesians 4:2-3

When I first asked for verses, I didn’t read them, just wrote them down. I figure the person who gave me Proverbs 21:19 was trying to be funny. Looking at the verse, it is hard to see the light behind it. It is basically saying giving up all society, safety, shelter, and life are better than being with a quarrelsome and nagging wife. I researched some commentary about it and then found both the Genesis and the Ephesians Verse. The Lord blesses a marriage and makes the union of three people (the bride, the groom, and the Lord). We are eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit.

Now if a wife (I would say husband too) is quarrelsome and nagging, to me that isn’t is the normal things that get on your nerve. Rather it is the life-altering actions that can affect your mortal safety and prosperity (abuse in al its forms) but more importantly your eternal salvation. If your relationship with the Lord is in jeopardy due to the quarrelsome and nagging spouse, I could see where being away from everything is closer to salvation. God is with you everywhere and will protect you. If getting away from that allows you to be closer to the Lord, then to me this is what it means.

I am no Bible expert, nor do I speak in Dogma, but I believe that while we are to be unified for life, there are those cases, where living in the desert (or wilderness) is better than living with a quarrelsome and nagging spouse.

I hope to never have to make that choice, but I know those who have.


Are you willing to work with your spouse so that you don’t need to choose the wilderness over marriage? Will you invite the Lord into your marriage to heal the quarrels and worries?

I am willing with the help of God.

%d bloggers like this: